Video games are supposed to be fun, not frustrating. Challenging sure, but when you’re seven years old and your parents are helping you fill out your first Anger Management class application because you just pushed over your dad’s brand new Zenith television set after activating real-life beast mode, something is wrong. Blowing in the ends of NES game cartridges to make them work? That was fun! Seeing your AOL Internet connection time out just as your engineer in Command & Conquer was about to capture your opponent’s MCV because your family only had one phone line? Completely not fun – and you know what, it is still frustrating to think about today. Come to think of it – I can count five of my most frustrating video game moments from my childhood that still irritate the heck out of me, some twenty plus years later. Some may classify this as a recurring rage problem; I like to call it simply my passion for (un-interrupted, frustration free) gaming.
Now this is pretty neat. While many of us have likely already peered inside some of our favorite game controllers growing up, it probably wasn’t due to taking them carefully apart with a screwdriver – so what if we’ve all smashed a few in a fit of rage? That’s totally normal, plus you couldn’t save in pretty much any video game back in the 80’s, so what else were we supposed to do? I digress. Hit the link below for all the deconstruction photos, and see if you can correctly identify which system each controller belongs to; if you can’t, you were likely born in the 90’s. Oh, and I’ll help all you young bloods out a little by putting them in chronological order, with the oldest ones first. And GO!
Alright fellas, raise your hand if you ever built a fort in your living room or basement when your buddies came over as a kid. Yeah, we all did; ladies, many of you probably did the same. We also probably both played a crap load of video games when we had our friends over. Since I am now at the ripe age of 30 years, it was primarily the NES, then SNES, Sega Genesis and N64 which carried the bulk of the gaming load, with quite a bit of PC gaming in there as well, courtesy of the entire Command & Conquer franchise (which I dominated, naturally). But when does the slumber party/fort building/male or female bonding go a little too far? Oh, there are lots of ways; I won’t let your imagination stop running. If you really want do laugh, or maybe shudder is a better word, then click below for the oddest slumber party/male bonding experience you will likely ever witness in your lifetime.
Where are all my retro gamers at? Raise your hand if you grew up on the NES, and if the top two items on your Xmas list started with a Super Nintendo and ended with a Nintendo GameBoy, and I’m talking the old school brick of a GameBoy with a black and white screen. Color screen? That wasn’t even a rumor at that point; I think the word “fantasy” is a more apt description. All of us at that point in the gaming world were longing for realistic graphics, and in the late 80’s/early 90’s, we still had a long ways to go. The advent of the Super Nintendo really was a neat jump, as it allowed for at tremendous amount more processing power, and maybe above all else, a ton more colors. It really wasn’t until the N64 however until we really saw an epic graphical jump, and now today, we’re about as realistic as we’re going to get. Seeing these amazing photochops (easy to do, really) below really brings back some memories, although I’ll admit, there are some characters where I don’t know the game that they’re from. That’s where you come in; you’re slightly qualified, right? You raised your hand earlier, didn’t you?
Memes never get old, especially when they’re really good. To be in the upper echelon of funny memes, it all starts with the original background photo. Sure your captions may be stellar, but you won’t win your audience over unless it really fits well with the background photo. That being said, the funny gaming meme creation crew around the Internet has been hard at work at pumping out some hilarious ones since yesterday’s “Xbox Reveal Day“, which honestly has created more confusion than there was before. Although most gaming meme creators have aimed in on the “always-online” Internet connection “feature”, one photochopper decided to spin the reveal in an old-school way that probably only those of us that grew up on the NES would really appreciate. Hit the link below to see what I mean.
Oh this one takes me back. Although my internal clock will turn 30 years of age in just a couple short weeks, I am still proud enough to admit (on the Internet OR in real life) that video games are still a passion of mine. While I do not have as much free time to crank through game after game on a Saturday, I do get in as much game time as I can. So what does this have to do with the hilarious Fry from Futurama? Well, you see, we have a thing for Photochops and memes around these parts; for those of you lucky enough to have experienced our former website, you probably saw some of our best work. While the image below isn’t our creation, it’s a high quality gaming meme that all of our retro gaming readers will surely appreciate. It brought me back to the NES days, although I am still trying to remember which games I experienced this in. Hit the link to reminisce with us!
Gamers are a creative demographic, and when you throw in the fact that many of their mother’s are world class quilters, you’ve got a recipe for nerdiness that would make even Santa Claus face-palm. What would rank even higher on the nerdiness scale is if said gamer is also a world class quilter; or better yet, said gamer and said world class quilter is also a mother. Oh snap! Before I give this retro-ly (I’m making up words left and right today) awesome, funny gaming pic away, hit the link below and you’ll see what I’m talking about. You will not be disappointed.
So who remembers the mullet kid from Nintendo Power? Okay, hold on; maybe I should take a step back here. Who remembers Nintendo Power? Anyone? Bueller? If you’re too young to remember the awesomeness that was Nintendo’s “Nintendo Power” magazine, then I’m sorry because you honestly missed out. This was long before the days where you had awesome websites like SQ around; we kids had to wait four weeks in between issues, and let me tell you, when you’re trying to beat Battletoads, those maps that magazine had were priceless. I remember my original Nintendo Power subscription came with a free game; I got to choose one of three games, and though I can’t remember the other two, I ended up picking Dragon Warrior. Awesome game aside, do you want to know what else I remember from that first subscription to Nintendo Power? That mullet kid who had the coolest room in the world. And a turtleneck t-shirt. Hit the link below for pure nostalgia, and/or laughter regardless of what age you are.
It’s sad to think about, but I turn the fresh young age of 30 in approximately three weeks. I’ve been gaming for just about every single one of those years since my original spawn in 1983, and it started with many of the games/systems on the hilariously nostalgic list below. I’m looking forward (in a weird way) to the day when I’m 60, to see what the average “gaming age” will be then; it will be like the jokes that started on Facebook a few years ago that asked the question, “What happens when we all start getting old?” Awesome photo roll below that’s sure to make your Tuesday less crappy!
I’m a man of my word. In response to my last post on WikiHow’s How to Get Your Girlfriend to Play Video Games, I promised I’d throw together a comprehensive guide on a much more important issue: How to Get a Girlfriend, If You’re a Gamer. You see, before you can try to fanoogle your girlfriend into playing video games, you actually need to have a girlfriend in the first place. That girl you kidnapped and have tied up in your garage; she doesn’t count, sorry. Like in your favorite scientific journal (I prefer
Maxim Popular Science), authors usually list their edumacational background to validate their arguments. For this guide, I intend to follow the same outline, so let’s take a lil’ gander at my slightly qualified credentials, shall we? Continue reading “How to Get a Girlfriend, If You’re a Gamer”
Addiction is a strong word, but when we’re talking about Demon’s Souls/Dark Souls, addiction may not be a strong enough word to describe how much I enjoy these games. Above all else, the insane challenge and actual feeling of achievement with this series makes these games amazing. When I sit down to play Demon’s Souls, I honestly feel like I’m playing an old school NES game with no save capability, except I’m seeing Playstation 3 graphics and not 8-bit pixels and sprites. I could go on for pages, but let me just state that if you haven’t picked up Demon’s Souls or Dark Souls, you’re wrong. Go fix yourself. Enjoy the salivating footage, and hit the link below for more details/comments.